


If I call you Spideybabe will you call me Sweetiepool?

by jedimasterkat



Series: The Adventures of Spidey-Keith and Lancey-Pool [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Deadpool Lance, I can't believe I did this, I'm crying bc of the art and other fics I've read of this, Keith can't believe this, Keith.exe has stopped working, Lance has no shame, Lance is very suggestive, M/M, Spider-Man Keith, Spideypool Klance AU, You guys are so nice btw, greatest au, i accidentally made a whole backstory for deadpool lance rip, i also made a whole backstory for spidey keith oops, superhero au, you guys are gonna get more of this au than you thought
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-21 10:50:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9545183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedimasterkat/pseuds/jedimasterkat
Summary: Keith has a love hate relationship with the new guy in town. As in, Keith as Spider-Man has a love hate relationship with the new guy Deadpool and Keith as a high school senior has a love hate relationship with the new guy Lance.What he wasn't ready for was for the love hate relationship to take a hard turn towards the love side and both of his annoyances to be the same person.AKA: The Spideypool Klance AU that I can't stop thinking about.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe I spent so long on this but it's dear to my heart. 
> 
>  
> 
> Inspired by [this art](https://twitter.com/emuyhn/status/825786346652495872) by @emuyhn on twitter and [this art](https://twitter.com/donut_fingers/status/825844611914596352) by @donut_fingers on twitter. Thank you emuyhn for this awesome idea!! You have single-handedly saved 2017.

Lance didn’t get into trouble.

But right now, he was in trouble. 

It was a normal day. He was late to class, talked to Keith, stared at Keith, got frustrated because he stared at Keith, bickered with Keith, wanted to make-out with Keith, and then finally, the school day was over. He’d had to stay after for a little while working on a group project for physics, so it was dark by the time he’d left the school. Not that he was scared of the dark. He wasn’t scared of anything. Well, maybe a couple things, but definitely nothing trivial like dying on the way home from school. Lance was humming along to the song that played in his ears, and before he knew it he was surrounded and shoved into the nearest alley. He reached his hand up to pull out his earphones.

“Did I forget about a party?” Lance sized up the 5 men around him. They were all bulkier than he was, and three had knives out, but their stances were untrained. He could easily knock 4 of them down, the fifth that was in front of him looked a little more balanced on his feet so he might take some work. There wasn’t that much Lance could do without his gear though, and his identity was already given away so he couldn’t fight like usual just in case these guys took the information back to someone higher up. 

“Give us the bag and no one gets hurt.” Lance peeked over his shoulder at his backpack, catching the eye of the man blocking him in from behind. 

“This old thing? Look, if you wanted some pointers on the latest styles all you had to do was ask nicely.” 

“Shut up, boy. Last time I’m asking. Give us the bag.” The group moved in a little closer and Lance tightened his backpacks straps a tad more.

“Hey!” He yelled accusingly at the main man, pointing a finger in his direction,”I just finished writing my paper for Lit, there’s no way you’re getting my laptop now.” The guy in charge snarled but Lance struck before he could process. He jumped, and kicked a foot on the chest of the main guy, using him to flip over the man that was behind him. In the confusion, he easily grabbed the jacket hood of the rear end man, bringing him down hard, causing his head to slam against the concrete.

“Whoops, little rough there. He’ll wake up… maybe.” Lance smiled at the three that remained standing as the boss guy made his way off the ground again. He lunged towards the closest one, delivering a series of punches to face, one in the crotch for good measure, and then another knock out punch that sent him to the ground. A sudden pain shot up his arm and he looked down to see a knife protruding from his bicep. One of the lackeys grinned and Lance huffed a breath.

“Aw man, you made a hole in my favorite jacket! The jacket says fuck you, by the way. Time for sweet, sweet-” Lance’s words were cut off as his body suddenly convulsed. He dropped to his knees, disoriented. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth, and his limbs were twitching out of his control.

“That should’ve dropped you, how are you still conscious?” The main man walked closer and Lance could see him holding what looked like the lovechild between a police baton and a taser. 

“I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve. Just give me a few more seconds and I’ll be up.” Lance slurred the words out as his vision cleared slightly. He rose to stand once more, but his movements were slow and uncooperative. “That thingy-ma-jig you got there packs a punch. Where can I get me one of those?” 

“You won’t be needing one where you’re going.” The others pushed him down to the ground, and another volt of electricity racked his body.  _ Aw shit, they keep this up and they’ll realize who I am. _

“I can do this all night. Might pass out, but the voices should wake me up again pretty quick.” Lance leaned his head back onto the pavement, aware of the knife cutting his backpack straps off but unable to move his arms to do anything about it. “Hey, why-why’d get a taser stick like that anyways? You guys after like, uh… someone else?” He stuttered his way through the sentence.

“Guess there’s no harm in telling a dead man. We’re after that nasty fucker Deadpool. He’s ruined our shipments one too many times. And when he brings that other bug freak along too they really get on my nerves. Got some new toys for them though. You were the first test subject.” The man snickered as he took another step closer. “Looks like it’s lights out for you.” Lance blinked slowly, smiling as the death-but-not-death stick moved closer and a flash of movement caught his eye above the buildings.   


“Hey, I wouldn’t go around calling Spidey a freak, Deadpool might really kill you for poking fun at his boyfriend. The walls have ears, as they say. Or do the walls have eyes? Hey walls, can ya help a guy out over here, do you have ears, or eyes, or both?” The boss scrunched his face up in confusion and anger as Lance spoke to the wall next to him. Lance saw the 2 lackeys behind the boss get swung up into oblivion out of the corner of his eye, and he smiled wider when his rescuer pounced onto the one behind him, knocking him to the ground and tying him up.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Spider-Man shot web across the alley, pulling the taser stick from the hands of the boss. “And I’m keeping this.” Lance watched from the ground as Spider-Man made quick work of the foes. Just as he was about to send up the boss in his web trap, Lance wiggled his fingers.

“Lights out, my dude. And the walls do have ears. It’s the hills that have the eyes.” His web prison swung up, and Spidey dropped back down to ground level, holding out a hand to Lance. Lance took it, and slowly rose from the ground, trying to shake the last of the black spots out his eyes.

“You held your own there for a while, I was impressed.” Lance tried to pinpoint the voice, but his mind was too muddled to think. It was far from his first encounter with Spidey, but it was only his third or fourth encounter with him as Lance.

“Oh, so you were watching? And impressed? I’m flattered.” Lance grinned, leaning in closer to masked man, who took a step back in turn.

“Whatever... “ Lance was sure whoever was under the mask was blushing. “Look, I gotta go.” Spider-Man swung up the side of the building quickly as Lance reached out a hand to tell him to wait. He took a shaky step forward.

“Fuck, wait, please come back down, I didn’t even thank you!!” Lance yelled up at the sky, looking for any sign of web. He jumped at a tap on his shoulder, and swung around to see an upside-down Spidey holding out a bag.

“I almost forgot, here’s your backpack.” He reached out to take the ruined backpack from his hands. He quickly peeked inside, letting out a sigh of relief when he saw his laptop intact. Lance looked back up at the masked man, grinning as he planned his next move.

“So Deadpool’s not your boyfriend, which means you’re single?” Spider-Man face palmed, which looked quite amusing upside down. “How about a thank you dinner? There’s this pizza place with amazing garlic knots that I know you’ll love.” Lance ended the statement in a sing-song voice, trying to convince the hero to agree.

“I don’t have time. I have to-” Lance cut him off by grabbing the sides of his head.

“Wait… please. I’m sorry, I know I can be annoying.” Lance tried to look away from the white patches that indicated where Spider-Man’s eyes were, and moved his hands up to the bottom on his neck. “Can I…?” The question tapered off and he could hear the other boy suck in a breath. Spider-Man nodded slowly.

“Don’t go past my nose.” Lance nodded back, and softly gripped the edges of his mask, pulling it down over his chin to the bridge of his nose. The pale boy was breathing erratically and Lance was sure he was doing just the same. He smirked a bit at the tufts of black hair peeking out under the back of the mask.  _ Perfect. Just perfect. I knew I’d heard that voice before. _

“I’m gonna kiss you...” Lance’s sentence tapered off more like a question, and he leaned in slightly, trying to angle his head and lips to match those of the upside-down boy.

“Okay…” The word came out in a breathless whisper across Lance’s face, and Lance closed the distance. Their lips met awkwardly at first due to their positions, but they both shifted a bit more and managed to fit their faces together like a puzzle piece. Lance moved his lips slightly, his tongue grazing the other’s slightly. They tilted their heads differently so they could try to move closer. Lance let out a small sound as their lips connected better this time, and his hand trailed back to play with the dark hair he so very much wanted to run his hands through. The hero had both his hands on the side of Lance’s head, rubbing his thumb in circles behind one of his ears and driving him insane. He had started moving his lips in rhythm with Lances, and it took all of Lance’s self control not to rip the mask off the rest of his face right there.  _ Be patient, Lance. Tomorrow.  _ At some point he had forgotten his need to breath, he never really thought about it anyways, but Spidey had let go of his head and pulled back from the heated kiss. Lance could see the hero’s chest heaving, and he figured his own was probably doing the same. After a moment to calm down, he spoke again.

“I’d invite you back home but we can’t get very far if you keep that get-up on.” Lance smirked at the flustered boy as he shoved his mask back down, leaving a sliver of his tempting neck exposed.

“See ya around, Lance.” Lance could almost hear the smirk in his voice as Spidey slingshotted back up to the top of the roofs. He ran back out the alley to see the back of him webbing his way down the street.

“Hey!! You remembered my name!!” Lance’s silly grin faltered as he saw the blue flashing lights pop into view in the distance. “Welp, time for me to go too. See ya, Keith.” He smirked to himself again, running back into the alley and grabbing his backpack before getting out of there.

It wasn’t till he got back home that he noticed the taser stick sitting in his backpack and Lance got a plan.

* * *

 

 

Keith yawned as he walked into the school building. Thanks to a certain annoying brown-haired boy he hadn’t been able to sleep last night. He tried to fight back a blush as he remembered their kiss.  _ Lance doesn’t know it was you so it doesn’t even matter. I gotta chill out before- _

“Hey Keith.”  _ -Lance finds me. Well, too late now. Okay, Keith, stay calm, no reason to panic.  _ Keith looked up to see Lance leaning against the lockers next to his, smiling like it wasn’t 8:30 am and he hadn’t been attacked last night.  _ He doesn’t even look like there’s a scratch on him...weird... _

“Uh, h-hi?” Keith’s voice faltered as he spoke to Lance and he mentally cursed himself. He was a little confused that the first thing Lance hadn’t done was try to bicker with him, but he was completely unprepared for the next thing that came out of Lance’s mouth.

“So... you’re Spider-Man, huh?” And if Keith wasn’t awake before he was definitely awake now. His eyes shot open and he raised his shoulders defensively.  _ Just walk away, abort mission, abort mission, forget this morning even happened and never mention it again. _ Instead of listening to his conscious he started babbling like the horrible liar Shiro had always told him he was.

“N-NO!? I, uh, no!? Me?” He started laughing nervously, gripping a textbook, probably his math one, and trying to ignore the heat creeping onto his face. “Just… WHAT?!” His voice was got a little louder and some passer-by’s glanced over at them. “WHERE DID YOU… WHO!??!” Keith wasn’t sure what to say anymore but luckily… or unluckily… Lance spoke again. 

“Dude… I pulled down your mask.” Lance gripped his arms tighter across his chest. Looking away slightly but still keeping his eyes on Keith from the corner. “We kissed when you saved me.” Keith looked down at the ground, mulling over the words. His mind drew a blank and he could almost see the  _ Keith.exe has stopped working  _ pop-up when he blinked.  _ Can everyone tell who I am? What if I do something and they come after people I care about? Lance even? What am I gonna do? Should I cut my hair? Should I leave town? Should- _

“I’d recognize that mullet anywhere.” Lance grinned at him again, pointing at the back of his head where he currently had said “mullet” pulled back into a small ponytail.

“My… mullet?” Keith looked down as he continued contemplating the situation. Now that he and Lance had kissed, Lance knew who he was, and Lance obviously wasn’t fazed, what was next.

“Look, I can tell you’re still processing. Why don’t we talk after school? Besides, I have something to show you too. Oh, and give you. It’d probably be best if you came as Spidey now that I think about it.” Lance had placed a hand on Keith’s shoulder, and he flinched at first, but Lance gave a tight squeeze and he relaxed a little as Lance spoke. “Besides, I don’t wanna miss a chance to see your ass in that spandex.” Lance winked and Keith facepalmed embarrassingly. 

“Whatever.” Keith peeked between his fingers to see Lance had gotten slightly closer to him. Keith was highly aware of the warmth of his hand through his jacket and he felt his stomach flip. “But okay. Meet me across the street behind the bagel place after school.” Keith lowered his hand and Lance nodded.

“You got it, pretty boy.” Lance brushed past him as he wiggled his fingers in a wave. Keith stared after him, still processing the fact that the guy that annoyed him to no end was the same guy he had a crush on, and managed to figure him out because of a kiss. It almost seemed unreal, and that was saying a lot considering the types of things he saw as Spider-Man… let alone the fact that he was indeed, a human with enhanced abilities due to a spider bite. Lance’s words continued to echo in Keith’s head and-  _ Wait… did he call me pretty boy? The only person who’s called me that is- _ Keith jumped as the school bell rang, signaling the start of classes for the day. He quickly made sure he had everything he needed and rushed off to class, leaving his previous thought behind. 

*******

Keith paced back and forth up on the roof behind the bagel shop, waiting for Lance to show up. He’d started to get worried Lance wouldn’t show, it’d been 15 minutes already and even Keith had enough time to get in full disguise. Suddenly, an arm draped across the back of his shoulders and out of the corner of his eye he saw the familiar colors of his “partner-in-crime”so to speak. Keith still wasn’t convinced Deadpool was all good, but considering what he’d heard before and how he acted since he met him, the rumors weren’t all that true.

“What’s a good looking guy like you waiting up here all alone for?” Keith rolled his eyes and shrugged out of his grip.

“Fuck off, Deadpool. I’m waiting for someone and can’t have you hanging around here too.” The other hero threw his hand over his chest, feigning pain.

“Ouch, you hurt me, Spidey. Are you breaking up with me, is that it?” Deadpool leaned in close again and Keith clenched his fists.

“It’s none of your business. Get outta here.” Keith’s voice was quieter this time. It’s true he had grown quite fond of his partner. In a way, their bickering reminded him of the way him and Lance bickered at school. Deadpool was a charmer despite the fact he’d never seen his face. If him and Lance really did get together he wondered how it would affect his and Deadpool’s teamwork. It was easy to push off his advances, but Keith wasn’t sure he’d be able to ask him to stop.

“And that’s where you’re wrong, my dear Keith. It is all of my business, so to say.” Keith’s head swung back to face Deadpool. “You left this last night, by the way. Neat toy.” He could hear Deadpool’s grinning.

“How do you know my name? And how did you get that?” The gears started twisting in Keith’s mind as he began putting two and two together. “Wait… no way…”

“Yes way!” Deadpool let out his answer in a singsong voice as he grabbed Keith, jumped, and pulled Keith down into the broken window ceiling of the abandoned office building below them. Keith’s heart sped up as soon as Deadpool pulled him flush against his body. Their suits barely did anything to hide their body shapes, and Keith could feel the hard, lean muscles of his companion. As soon as they landed Keith pushed off of his body.

“Take off your mask.” Deadpool walked closer as Keith spoke, and Keith kept taking steps back. Suddenly, his back hit a wall and he couldn’t retreat any further.  _ Dammit, I wasn’t paying attention behind me. _

“You first.” Deadpool was right in front of him now.

“I’m not playing games with you, but fine. You already know anyways.” Keith reached up and pulled his mask all the way off his head, tossing it to the ground beside him. “Your turn.”

“Oh, I have a feeling you already know who I am.” Keith watched as the other boy reached up and began pulling his mask off. As soon as the sliver of dark skin peeked out from under the mask, Keith reached up and pushed his hands the rest of the way up quickly, revealing the face of none other than-

“Lance. You have got to be shitting me.” Keith couldn’t help but start laughing. He hadn’t laughed like this in a long time, but the situation was so comical he couldn’t help it.

“Hey watch your fucking language. And what’s so funny!? I’m cool enough to be a superhero!!” Lance pointed a finger at his chest accusingly, and Keith just covered his face with his hands as he tried to calm down. When he moved his hands Lance was just staring at him with a smile on his face.

“What?” Keith cocked his head to the side questioningly.

“You’re cute when you laugh.” Lance smirked as Keith blushed and glanced to the side, but he couldn’t escape Lance’s eyes at their close distance. Keith could feel the heat from Lance’s body inches away from his. His senses were being overloaded and the new information was sending his thoughts array.

“Can we sit down a sec?” Keith slid down the wall behind him, leaning his head against it when he plopped his ass unceremoniously on the ground. Lance took one step forward and did the same.

“What’s up? I mean I know it’s a lot to take in, trust me. I barely got any sleep last night thinking about you- uh, i mean… it, ya know, like, the situation.” Keith could see Lance huff out a nervous chuckle.

“I mean I didn’t really get any sleep last night either cause I was, um, thinking about you too.” Keith could feel himself flush as he spoke. “Like, you as in Lance.”

“Well, glad we’re on the same page so far. I mean, it’s still crazy that you’re Spider-Man. Although I’d let you tie me up anyday.” Lance winked at him and Keith rolled his eyes.

“Why’d you come to New York anyways? I’d always heard that Deadpool went solo.”

“I needed a fresh start. Some… stuff happened and I decided to take advantage of it and try to actually finish school. Although I really am older than the senior class by a couple years, I guess I just couldn’t let it go.” Lance’s face had changed to a more contemplative one as they spoke.

“Does the “stuff” include why you’re not disfigured like everyone says you are?” Keith really had a lot of questions. He only knew Lance, and never knew much behind him. On the other hand, he’d only heard rumors about Deadpool, and only knew the Deadpool he met 4 months ago. The rumors were nothing like the Deadpool he knew… well, maybe a couple of them were.

“Oh yea, that was the really freaky part. Some doctor guy took me up into these mountains and did some weird shit. Something about another reality where I wasn’t disfigured. Luckily we didn’t make any sort of space-time implosion like he said might happen.” Keith nodded his head, showing Lance that he was in fact still listening. “He took me back to the X-Men after that. But he really did give me a new chance at life. All I used to do was kill people. It’s hard to care about life when you can’t die. I spent a few months over there before deciding to come to New York. Part of it was you. Spider-Man seemed to have a normal life here, so why couldn’t I?” Keith didn’t say anything for a minute. He was glad Lance was deciding to share this with him. He really never thought about how hard other heroes have it. He was lucky all he had to do was get bit by a spider. He’d only heard the stories about Deadpool and how he was taken from his family for a cancer treatment gone wrong.

“I’m glad you came to New York. It was getting a little lonely out here.” Keith leaned his head on Lance’s shoulder and reached over to lace their fingers together. He heard Lance let out a sigh. Maybe a sigh of relief that Keith didn’t care what he’d done, or who he was. And Keith didn’t care. To him, Lance was Lance, his classmate, his partner-in-crime, his Deadpool.

“I’m glad I came to New York too.” Lance squeezed his hand, and Keith squeezed back.

“Wanna go find some ass to kick?” Keith stood, pulling and grinning Lance up with him. “I mean you didn’t even help me at all last night. Surprised that thing took you down like that.” 

“Hey! That thing is powerful!! Besides, I’m not going anywhere until after you give me a kiss.” Lance pointed at his lips, and Keith rolled his eyes as he leaned up slightly, pressing his lips to Lance’s. He couldn’t help but smile as Lance peppered his face with kisses and pulled him close. They pulled on their masks and jumped back up to the roof of the building, slowly making their way to the inner city.

“Oh, and I was serious, will you really tie me up in bed? I mean you’ve got the perfect- OW!” Deadpool grabbed his arm as Keith swung up onto the next building, facing his partner, arms crossed, and smirking under his mask.

“I tell you what….You find the first sign of crime and we’ll see what I can do.” Lance was grinning under his mask, already pushing off the side of the building as Keith took flight.

“Hey, maybe I should start calling you kinky boy instead of pretty boy.”

“LANCE!” He grinned as he heard Keith’s scolding yell from above him.

“I’ll take Honeypool, or Sweetiepool or something, Spideybabe!!” Lance could almost see the annoyance radiating off Keith.

“I’m breaking up with you!!”

“Aw, come on, we're bonding, Spideyhon!! I just tweeted the good news!! We can’t break the fangirls hearts already!!” Lance braced himself as he saw Keith do a 180 turn and swing back towards him. Lance read his thoughts and grabbed on as Keith smoothly turned propelled the both of them upward. They landed again on the top a building and Keith gave him a playful shove.

“I can’t believe I like you.” Lance smiled under his mask at Keith’s words.

“I know you’re just trying to distract me from the real goal here.” Lance could hear Keith huff a breath. “They say no one can get out of that web and I just wanna test it out, what’s the harm?” Keith turned away from Lance this time.

“Unbelievable…” Lance wrapped his arms around him, hugging him from behind.

“Unbelievably cute.” Keith relaxed in his grip. “And thanks for the view, babe. Of the city, and on life.” They stayed like that for a few moments, talking about their lives and taking in the sky just before sunset in the distance.  _ I could get used to this, _ Keith thought.

“What if something happens to one of us? This isn’t exactly a safe job…” Keith turned to face Lance, still holding onto his sides and looking at him as questioningly as he could through his mask.

“Keith, I’ve seen you fight, and I trust you with my own life. I know I’m a special case, and maybe you don’t have to worry about me as much as I worry about you, but we just have to take things as they are. No sense in worrying about things we don’t know yet. Let’s enjoy it while we can.” Keith nodded, but the moment was over quickly as a familiar feeling enveloped his mind.

“Spidey-sense just pinged me. Something’s going down just below. Race ya.” Keith grinned as they took off with Lance rambling on about their bet, the internet, and whoever was calling them Spideypool. 

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/buhoothoot) for shitposting, memes, and more of my writing!


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